Where Obito Never Left
by Esellyn
Summary: Obito doesn't die in the rock slide. Oneshot


Obito woke up. He wasn't sure how, as he distinctly remembered being crushed under rocks, then giving his eye to Kakashi, before blacking out. He looked around, beginning to blush as he spotted Rin slumped over across his legs, fast asleep. Kakashi was sitting with his head bowed and his arms folded, breathing silently and evenly. Minato-sensei and Kushina were tangled together on the window seat in his hospital room. The sky was dark, and Obito assumed it was rather late, especially since everyone was asleep.

Obito closed his eye, slumping back against his pillows. Everyone was safe, and that was the important thing.

He woke up again in the morning, startling Rin, who nearly fell off her chair. "Obito! You're awake!"

Kakashi's head of silver hair snapped in his direction, staring intently at him.

Minato and Kushina looked up from where they were bent over a scroll. "Obito!" Minato crowed happily. "Are you okay? Oh, sorry, bad question, are you feeling better? Are you in pain?"

Obito blinked at his sensei for a bit, then shook his head, opening his mouth to reply. Then his thirst made itself known. "Water," he croaked out instead.

Kakashi, who was closest to the sink, brought a glass of water over and set it against Obito's lips. "You're awake."

Obito drank the water thankfully, Kakashi taking it back to the sink when he'd drank it all. "Yeah, I am. How'd you get me out from under the rock?"

"Gai found us," Kakashi said, setting the water on the bedside table.

Obito blinked owlishly at the Hatake. "What? Maito Gai, your eternal rival?"

Kakashi frowned at Obito. "Yes. Are there any other Gai's in Konoha?"

Obito blushed. "No, I guess not."

"Are you in pain?" Rin asked, butting in.

Obito took a moment to think about it, then shook his head slightly. "Not right now."

Rin smiled. "Good. Try not to move too much though. You had a lot of damage. The doctors had to remove your entire right arm, and it was very touch and go for a while there. You're lucky Tsunade was in town, without her here, you probably wouldn't have survived."

"Can I still be a ninja?" Obito asked, frowning slightly.

"We don't know," Minato said after a lengthy pause. "But there's a good chance you won't recover enough to be a ninja again."

Obito's face fell. "Really?"

Minato made a move like he wanted to rest his hand on Obito's shoulder, but thought better of it, and sighed. "I'm sorry."

Tsunade came into the room, a clipboard held in her hands, pen at the ready. "Ah, Obito, you're awake! That's good."

"Tsunade-sama!" Rin said, turning to face the older medic.

"Hello, Rin-chan. Now, Obito, how are you feeling?"

Obito shrugged, then his entire right side lit up in a stunning display of pain. He cried out, and both Rin and Tsunade immediately had their hands glowing green and running over his right side.

"Oh, Obito," Tsunade sighed, placing her glowing hand against his side. The pain faded away, and Obito sighed in relief. "No more moving, alright?"

Obito nodded slightly. He was not doing that again. No way in Kami.

Rin's hands stopped glowing, and she sat back into her chair. "You had me worried."

Tsunade shook her head at Obito. "You're lucky to be alive."

"So Rin told me," Obito managed.

Tsunade shook her finger at him. "Shh. Now, your ribs on your right side were very nearly smashed to smithereens, but I managed to repair them in time. Your lungs were pretty busted up too, and so were most of your organs on your right side. We did have to remove your arm, as it was little more than flesh and some bone shards. Your right leg was a bit better, but we did end up having to remove a good chunk of it too. Any other bones on your right side were cracked at best, severely broken at worse. You'll be in this hospital for a long time buddy, get comfortable."

"Will I be able to be a ninja again?" Obito asked, his voice close to cracking.

Tsunade sighed. "Unknown. At the very least, you'll need prosthetics. That can severely hinder a ninja. For now, your best bet is working as an office ninja. We can't really put you on the front lines."

Obito would've slumped if he was able. "Okay," he said in a small voice.

Kushina watched sadly as the hope left Obito's eye. "Obito, if it gets too bad at home, we have room at our house."

Kakashi sighed but nodded. "And so do I."

Obito gave a half-hearted smile to his teammate and sensei's wife. "Thanks, but I'll be fine."

"If you say so," Kushina said, a bit doubtfully.

Tsunade glanced forlornly at the clipboard she'd dropped in her rush to administer the pain killer jutsu to Obito. "Well, I'll check in later. Have a nice day and no moving." With that, she spun on her heel and walked out, scooping up the clipboard on her way out.

When Obito finally got out of the hospital, he realized that not a single Uchiha had come to visit him. His team had been there nearly 24/7, Rin and Kakashi especially, as she worked at the hospital, and Kakashi was on leave and had nothing better to do.

"I wonder if I could just abduct you and bring you to my house instead," Minato mused. "Not like they'd notice."

Obito shook his head. "I have to go home, sorry."

Minato sighed deeply. "I don't like it."

"You've said that," Obito said, grinning wryly at his sensei.

Minato pouted at him. "Doesn't mean it isn't true, and shouldn't be said again."

Obito shook his head, still smiling. "Right, my bad."

They arrived in the Uchiha district a bit too quickly for Obito's tastes. The Uchiha as a clan ignored him the best they could, even though he had his Sharingan now. If anything, they ignored him even more. Obito was fine with it. He didn't, couldn't care anymore.

* * *

He decided then and there that it was high time he passed a genin team. He wasn't mean or anything, he just needed teamwork already partially in their heads, so he could beat it in further. Also, that was sensei's son and his second favorite cousin's little brother. Kushina-nee wished she could be her son's Jounin instructor, but she was 4 months pregnant. Minato was not letting her be a Jounin instructor in that condition. Even if he had to sleep on the couch for a week. It would've been longer, but Obito was basically the next best thing. Kakashi was busy in ANBU, and Rin was busy with the hospital, so Obito was the last option to continue the teaching line. He needed a genin team to be Hokage anyway. He'd recovered well enough to actually be an active duty shinobi, the prosthetics not hindering him in the slightest. They did, of course, have extensive seal networks on them, making sure that they functioned just like his lost limbs, courtesy of Kushina and Minato. Plus some help from Jiraiya and Tsunade.

He was late, of course, he was, but it was only by 15 minutes, and not like they realized it anyway. Iruka certainly did, and Obito laughed sheepishly, herding his new genin out of the door quickly. He led, or herded, he wasn't actually sure which, his new genin to the roof. He liked the roof, open, and then he could run off across the rooftops. He could also fall off the building to scare them if they insulted him too badly.

"Alright!" Obito chirped. "If you wouldn't mind introducing yourselves! Name, age, likes, dislikes, I really don't wanna hear about idiotic crushes or hatred for teammates, we'll deal with that later, hobbies, dreams, and one thing you have to do to reach said dream!"

The pink-haired girl, he didn't really know her name, sue him, he was a bit forgetful. But he had read the files. "Why don't you go first, sensei?"

Obito thought about that. "Alright! My name's Obito Uchiha, Cousin to that brat there, I'm 27, I like dango and my cute little cousins, I dislike when Bakashi tries to show me up just cause he is listed S-class in the bingo book, and I'm only listed as A-rank, my hobbies include tending to my plants! My dream is to be the fifth Hokage after Minato-Sensei, and you guys are the thing I have to do to reach it! You make chuunin, and I can be Hokage!"

"Kakashi-nii is stronger than you," Naruto said flatly.

Obito drooped. "Not by much! I'm a Hokage candidate!"

"After you deal with us," Sasuke pointed out, a mischievous look on his face.

"I can still fail you and you know it!" Obito warned him.

Sasuke and Naruto had the gall to laugh at him, and he drooped again, falling off the building, sticking to the side with one hand as he fell. They just saw him fall, and immediately rushed over to the side to stare at him. He smiled cheekily at them from his perch on the side of the building. They all frowned at him. Obito stood up, and walked back up the side of the building, ending up back on the roof again.

"Alright, you introduce yourselves, and I reserve the right to make fun of you, cause you made fun of me." Obito stuck his tongue out at them, and Naruto and Sasuke stuck theirs back out at him. The girl just looked confused. "You, Pinkie, first," Obito pointed at her dramatically.

"Oh, uhm, I'm Sakura Haruno, my age is 11, but I'm turning 12 soon, I like," she paused and was clearly about to squeal or do something else stupid while looking at her poor teammate when Obito stopped her.

"Nope, I said I don't wanna hear about crushes and stuff. Keep your personal problems to yourself!"

Sakura frowned at him but continued. "My likes are anmitsu and umeboshi, dislikes are idiots, my hobby is trivia books and reading," she paused again, and Obito held up a hand.

"I'm stopping you there, I really don't want to hear about your crush on my poor cousin."

Sasuke looked highly relieved, while Sakura pouted at him.

"Oh, how about you go next, my adorable little brother who's clearly very glad none of his fangirls are on the team?" Obito grinned cheekily at Naruto, who stuck his tongue out at him.

"I'm Namikaze Naruto! I like my parents and three little siblings, and kaa-chan's cooking, and when Tadaaki-nii comes over! I dislike it when Obito-nii, and Kakashi-nii, and Rin-nee are too busy to come and play, and when my siblings mistake me for tou-san! My hobbies are helping kaa-chan around the house, and taking care of my siblings so she can do kaa-chan stuff! My dream is to be Hokage, so I can make people as happy as my tou-san does! Uh, I guess a step towards that is making chuunin so Obito-nii can be Hokage, and appoint me as his successor when I'm ready!"

Obito, having already abandoned whatever dignity he'd been born with years ago, cooed at him, and ruffled his hair. Of course, that was assuming he'd ever had dignity at all, and maybe that was asking a bit too much of him.

"Obito-nii!" Naruto protested, trying to fix his hair. "Kaa-chan showed me how to make my hair stay down, and you ruined it!"

"You'll survive!" Obito told him cheerfully.

Naruto pouted at him.

Sasuke apparently decided to go ahead. "I'm Sasuke Uchiha, I'm 12, I like my Aniki and two of my cousins, I like when kaa-san makes stuff with tomatoes, and I like it when Aniki cooks too. I dislike fangirls."

Obito interrupted him long enough to mutter, "who doesn't?"

Sasuke ignored him and continued. "My hobbies are training with my Aniki and my cousins, defending said cousins from idiots who don't realize they're the coolest Uchiha ever, except Madara, and my dream is to be as powerful as Aniki, and be ANBU commander. I guess chuunin is a step towards that too."

Obito smiled. "That's a good goal. Work towards it, and you'll reach it."

* * *

They passed, of course, the two boys working together wonderfully, Sakura trying her best, but absolutely failing to be useful after Obito pinned her with a Sharingan glare. There wasn't even a genjutsu behind it, and Obito had turned it off after a couple of seconds. She just stood there, trembling like a scared rabbit for the rest of the test.

He'd tied her to the pole, the boys fed her, all was well. Relatively, he still had to get rid of that annoying Fangirl mentality. He had just the thing though!

"Alright, we'll be separated for the first few weeks, if not the first month or so. Sakura, you'll be with me in the mornings. Be at training ground 7 at 6:30 in the morning. I will provide breakfast, and you will eat it. Apologies in advance if I'm a few minutes late, that happens a lot. I will not be more than about 30 minutes late though. Promise," Obito gave her a blinding grin. "One of my cousins will be there as well, and she'll introduce you to something you should like! If not, we'll check if Rin has anything you like. You'll be released for the day at 11:30, for lunch. I don't want to see you again after that until the next morning!"

Sakura looked mildly dismayed but nodded.

"I really don't care what you do after training, hopefully, you'll find another training ground to do more of it, but whatever. Now, boys, you have the afternoons. 12:30 to 5:30, cause Kushina-nee and Mikoto-sama, are going to kill me if you two are any later than that. Rin is going to be on standby on any days we're doing potentially dangerous stuff, aka jutsu, so neither of you dies. Yes, Naruto, I know that the fuzzball heals you plenty, but we're having Rin on standby anyway. Again, your mothers would kill me if I didn't, and excuse me if I want to live to see 30."

* * *

"I'm telling you, the tiny basterds pestered me into it!" Obito protested. "Your son especially!"

Minato raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

Obito nodded. "All this time spent around both of us and you really thought any of them would turn around?"

Minato sighed. "Fine, but next time tell them you're coming back, and no excuses about the client being elderly and being obligated to help them."

Obito nodded sheepishly. "Got it. About the chuunin exams…"

"You can enter your genin," Minato allowed, "But don't be surprised if Iruka tries to kill you for that."

Obito chuckled nervously. "Got it Minato-sensei!"

"Don't die, you're still my retirement plan," Minato warned him playfully.

"Yes sensei!" Obito chirped, already halfway out the window. Minato, who was fond of going out the window himself, always left the windows open, and Obito and Kakashi were fond of using them. Rin came in the door like a normal person.

* * *

Oooh, shoot, sensei was maaad. Obito backed away slowly from the barrier, recognizing the look on his sensei's face. Kakashi, or, he supposed, Inu, cause he had his ANBU mask on, was backing away right in step with him, the other ANBU following their captain's example.

Minato was absolutely furious at being trapped in the barrier, and was rapidly scribbling up a counter to the barrier jutsu. He put the paper on the barrier, activating it, and he disappeared in a yellow flash.

The invasion was over in seconds, with Minato out of the barrier, the Suna and Oto nin fled in terror. Minato was flee on sight for a reason. Well, flee on suspected sight, since when you saw him, you were usually dead about half a second later.

* * *

Minato decided to retire from the Hokage spot a few years later, passing the hat to Obito, and settling down with Kushina to raise their little herd of children. Kushina went on missions, but Minato chose to stay at home.

Rin rose to the head of the hospital, taking up Tsunade's old work of getting medic-nin on every squad. She succeeded, training dozens of medic nin to work on the front lines, but only Sakura did she keep as her apprentice.

Kakashi was happy in ANBU, but Obito kicked him out after a while and made him go be a normal jounin. Kakashi pouted at him for weeks, but eventually forgave him.

Orochimaru died by Minato's hands, Anko finally free of the curse mark that had vexed everyone for years.

Naruto became jounin, and Obito started training him to be his replacement when he wanted to settle down with Rin, who had happily said yes to marrying him.

Sasuke went right for ANBU, following his brother into their ranks. There he was happy, just another mask in their ranks.

Sakura flourished as Rin's apprentice, taking up poisons quickly and with a passion that made civilians look at her warily, and seasoned ninja coo. And if she single handedly dragged Tsunade back to teach her the strength of a hundred seal, and brought Shizune to teach her more poisons, no one made any comment.

Yeah, Akatsuki never stood a chance...


End file.
